The truth of the Washington square mall Santa
by Sean Justus ’13
The truths of the North Pole, and the Washington Square mall Santa are finally revealed.
Santa decided one fine Monday afternoon that he would share some of his special insights of the Washington Square mall and the North Pole with the Jesuit community.
“During the winter, the elves and I are very busy up in the North Pole,” said Santa. “The elves never stop talking and are good entertainment, but when things get stressful, they can get very irritating.”
The elves and Santa have a roller coaster of a relationship, but Santa and the reindeer, are much closer.
“I love the raindeer, but one thing people do not know is that the raindeer do not like carrots, in fact they prefer alfalfa,” Santa added. “And also, I do not like regular milk, I prefer chocolate milk and/or hot chocolate. Also, when it comes to cookies, I only like chocolate chip and sugar cookies.”
Santa has two winter jobs, one being The Santa, and his day job, from 10-9 is being a mall Santa at Washington Square mall. Santa talks to all the little boys and girls that run throughout the mall and makes their dream of meeting Santa come true.
“I decided to be a mall Santa because I grew old, fat, and I had a cool beard, so I figured, why not?” Santa said.
There are few physical requirements of a mall Santa, but being fat, old, and having a beard are the key requirements.
Santa meets the requirements for his winter job, but what he does the other three seasons of the year is a mystery, until now.
“During the summer I take a break from the North Pole and from Washington Square, and I have a house in Dallas, Texas where Mrs. Claus and I live,” said Santa. “I like to go to Texas Ranger games with Mrs. Claus in the summer, and I very often wear my Santa suit to add to the entertainment.”
Santa likes to spread the Christmas spirit and joy throughout the year, and that includes the sunny summer season. Dressing up as Santa at Ranger games can help remind the baseball fans both at the game that the Christmas joy is only months away.